(THEME SONG PLAYING)
Hey.
Hey, hey, hey!
Hey, he can't talk. She's got his tongue.
Hello! We're supposed to be meeting new people.
I want to make out.
Oh, come on, Angela. This is our freshman orientation.
You know, this is a new place.
We're supposed to be meeting new people.
You don't want to make out with me?
No, I absolutely want to make out, you know.
I just want to meet people,
and I've never met anybody while I'm making out.
Except for one night, but that was a fluke.
Hi, I'm Camryn.
Hi, I'm Shawn.
And this is my friend Angela.
What?
You said "friend."
I did?
(CHUCKLES)
I meant, this is my girlfriend Angela.
My girlfriend.
Oh, you two are together?
Shawn?
Girlfriend and boyfriend.
Oh! Well, see you around campus.
All right. Cool.
How you doing?
I'm good, friend. How you doing?
Oh, come on, Angela. I made a mistake. I'm sorry, okay?
Let's make out.
Oh, it's okay.
We don't have to.
We can meet new people.
I just didn't know it was that important to you.
I don't want you to miss out on anything.
What do you mean by that?
You want to meet new people,
and I'm not new people,
so what do you want it to mean?
(CORY EXHALES CONTENTEDLY)
You know, whoever thought up these orientations
is a genius.
You know, you're going to have to go in there sometime.
Men and women going to the same bathroom.
It's freaky!
Cory, it's just a co-ed bathroom.
Come on, come in with me.
No! You're going to look at me!
I won't look at you!
You don't want to look at me?
Fine. I'll look at you.
I knew it!
You have issues.
Hey, hey, hey!
Where you going, sunshine?
I'm going to take a shower and meet chicks.
Hey!
My girlfriend's in there.
Okay!
TOPANGA: Wow!
Wow!
Still can't go in there, huh, Cor?
I'm telling you, you might like it.
I, for one, can't get enough of it.
Girls shower in there.
Naked.
So what do you care about naked girls?
You have your own naked girl.
I mean, she has the potential to be naked
at some point in her career.
Well, actually, not anymore.
Angela and I decided to take a break.
You broke up?
Yeah. I guess that's what we did.
Why?
You know, it wasn't just my idea. It was Angela's, too.
Yeah, but why?
Okay, after that orientation party,
we talked about all the new opportunities
that are open up to us here,
and, you know, neither one of us want to miss out.
Hey, I got to tell you, Shawn,
I think you're making a terrible mistake.
We just want to see what else is out there.
What a bunch of crap, Shawn. Come on!
You know that there's nothing out there better than you and her.
Cory, not everybody's like you, you know.
Not everybody spends the rest of their life with one girlfriend.
Topanga, did you know that Shawn...
Shawn and Angela broke up? Yeah, Angela told me.
I think you guys are both handling it with incredible maturity.
How is breaking up mature?
Working it out is mature.
Sticking together is mature.
Cory, not every couple is just like us.
Yeah, but I want them to be like us.
I want them to be happy.
Angela and I aren't going to let this affect our friendship,
so neither should you.
You guys are both my friends no matter what happens, okay?
Cor?
Yeah. You're both my friends.
No matter what happens.
And I know you'll be together in the end.
Yeah.
You try and tell the guy that something's over,
and he just won't let it go.
(INDISTINCT)
Hey, hey, doesn't that guy behind me look like Mr. Feeny?
Oh, don't even!
Feeny moved to Wyoming, okay? I have closed that chapter in my life,
and I've opened up a new one.
And you know what I call that chapter, Jack?
Chapter five.
No, no, you know what? I think he's right.
He does look like the guy
in the poster by your bed.
How you doing?
You think that that kid's Feeny?
Yeah. I'm pretty sure.
All right. Let's test him.
I'm going to ask him a question
that only Feeny would know the answer to.
Are you George Feeny?
It's me, you moron.
Correct! Hey!
Mr. Feeny, you couldn't stay away from me!
Hello, Mr. Matthews. Hello, Mr. Hunter.
How you doing? And Miss...
McGuire. Rachel. George Feeny.
Oh, it's so nice to meet you.
Eric talks about you all the time.
It's such a pleasure to finally meet Eric's grandpa.
Your what?
Maybe someday.
So, Mr. Feeny, what are you doing here?
I mean, I thought you were retired.
No, he couldn't stay away from me.
He's conveniently come back to teach this class.
Actually, I came back to be a student.
What, so you're not retired anymore?
Retired life didn't turn out to be
what I was looking for, Mr. Matthews.
Hello, everybody.
Welcome to developmental psychology.
I'm Dean Bolander.
I've had a rotten morning,
and I don't check my mood at the door.
Oh, my.
Down, boy.
Our first group project will be an exploration of human nature.
Is a person able to alter a trait
ingrained in his behavioral makeup since childhood?
Now, for this study, you will each need to choose a partner.
I call Jack!
What are you doing?
I knew you'd ask Rachel to be your partner,
so I got you before you could get to her.
Want to be partners, Mr. Feeny?
Delighted, Miss McGuire.
Why didn't you just ask Rachel
before I got the chance?
(INHALING)
It's hard to say.
You know, I don't have a lot of control
over what goes on up here.
Oh! A rubber band.
Neat-o!
Ooh, this is a good one.
Who are you?
Cory, this is Camryn.
Camryn, this is my roommate Cory, the rubber band man.
Hi.
Hello.
You know, that rubber band was on the door
for a reason, Cor.
(LAUGHS) A little present for me?
Excuse us.
Come on.
Okay, if there's a rubber band on the door,
it means the room is ocupado. You get it?
Shawn, how can you be with another girl so soon?
I mean, shouldn't there be a more suitable mourning period?
Nobody died, Cory. Angela and I broke up.
She's fine with it, and I'm fine with it,
so why don't you put that back on the door and git!
Hey, Cory, what are you doing?
What is that, a rubber band?
It's mine. It has nothing to do with what's behind the door.
Shawn got a girl in there?
(SCOFFS) Don't be silly, Angela.
I was just exercising.
(EXCLAIMS) Feel the burn!
You don't have to do that, Cory.
Thanks, but I wasn't just born with this body.
I am okay with it if Shawn has a girl in there.
Yeah. He said you would be.
He did? Yeah, well, it's none of my business anyway.
Why should I care?
Because you should care. Listen, Angela,
I don't understand how you can both be so calm about this.
Oh, drop it, Cory. I'm fine.
Because if it's bothering you, you should really tell me.
(SCOFFS) There's nothing to tell, okay?
I mean, it's not bothering me, so why should it bother you?
I'm just trying to be a friend.
Yeah, well, I appreciate it, Cory,
but let's not kid ourselves.
You and I were never really friends to begin with.
What?
How can she not like me?
How can she say I'm not her friend? I'm Cory!
Cory, you know Angela likes you.
She just doesn't really know you well.
I mean, you have to admit you never took the time to get to know her.
Topanga, what are you talking about?
I mean, she's been going out with my best friend
for over a year!
When the four of us went out, how many times
did you pull her aside and talk to her?
800 times.
Not once, Cory.
You never took the time to get to know her.
Well, you know, she never took me aside either.
Well, then let it go.
Oh, when do I ever let anything go?
We have the room to ourselves.
What?
How can she not like me?
Good morning, class.
Class?
Class!
Everybody pipe down!
They're all yours.
You've done this before, George?
She knows my name.
All right. Let's see what you got.
Any brave volunteers to start us off?
(WHISPERING) What are you doing?
Trust me. Teachers love the firsters.
Dean Bolander will be very impressed with our initiative,
and we will set an impossible standard
for the rest of the class.
George and Rachel. Let's hear it.
No, I can't go first. I don't like first. I can't.
We have a great presentation.
Now, you can do it. Come on.
You know something, Dean, if these two aren't ready,
I think Jack and I are ready to prove that...
What was our thing?
Well, here we are, right?
And you're fine.
So go ahead.
You do it. You. You.
Uh, it is our postulation
that, uh, free will determines behavior
and not one's environment.
Rachel?
Uh...
And we will prove...
And, uh, we're going to prove that...
Oh, I'm so nervous, Mr. Feeny.
Uh, we will prove that strength of character
is the predominant force.
For example,
if a reformed criminal
returns to his old neighborhood,
does that mean that he will necessarily
return to a life of crime?
Anyone?
Mr. Hunter.
Um, no.
No, not if he's determined not to.
Very good, Mr. Hunter.
Very good, Mr. Suck-up-to-the-teacher.
He's not the teacher.
Well, then why did you answer him?
His will is too strong.
So, George, you're suggesting
that environment has no effect on behavior?
There will be ample time for questions after my presentation.
And a hand raise wouldn't kill you.
Excuse me?
Oh, my goodness.
Uh, Dean Bolander, I'm sorry.
I don't know what got into me. I apologize.
Uh, Rachel, would you please continue with our thesis?
I can't.
Yes, you can!
You're an excellent student and very well-prepared.
No, no. I mean, I can't continue with our theory.
But I think I can do the presentation now.
See, as my partner demonstrated,
our theory was all wrong.
I beg your pardon?
Environment obviously has a stronger effect on behavior
than we realized.
But you're not nervous now.
You have overcome your environment.
Yeah, but you haven't.
(KNOCKING ON DOOR)
Come in.
Hey, Angela.
Oh, look. I see you got my flowers.
But, uh,
who sent you these balloons?
Oh, look, I did.
"From your friend Cory."
Cory, I don't want you to send me anything.
Well, it's too late.
What are you doing?
Trying to study.
Hey, you remember when we studied for that test together
that one time, huh?
Wasn't that something?
We never studied for anything together.
Yeah, but we did other stuff together, right?
Like what?
Oh, I don't know. Didn't we find out
how Stella got her groove back together?
You are so down, my brother.
Angela, listen, I want you to know
that your friendship is really important to me.
No matter what happens between you and Shawn.
Where you going?
I'm going to go take a shower.
Why do you have to take a shower now?
Because it's the one place I know you won't follow me.
(SIGHS)
Angela?
I thought you were scared to death of this place?
I'm more scared of losing you.
(SIGHS) Oh, man.
Okay, what do you want with me?
I want to know why you don't want to be friends with me.
I mean, don't you think that I'm worth being friends with?
Cory, this has nothing to do with you.
Oh, it's Shawn, right?
Just because you broke up with Shawn
doesn't mean that we can't be friends.
I didn't break up with Shawn.
What do you mean?
He broke up with me. Can I get back to my shower now?
Wait a minute. Hold on. Stop!
What do you mean he broke up with you?
He thinks it's mutual.
Because that's what I want him to think.
Look, please don't ask me about this.
Why didn't you just tell him
that you don't want to break up with him then?
Oh, yeah, that's every girl's dream,
to beg somebody to stay with her.
Look, he needs his space.
He wants to meet new people.
No. No, he's wrong.
Come on, you know he's never going to find anybody
as good as you.
You don't even know me.
Fine. You're right.
I don't even know you.
Then why don't you give me a chance to know you?
You know, maybe Shawn's right.
We've all been together so long...
You know, it's just time for us to...
Shut up.
What? Shut up.
You couldn't be more wrong.
Friendship is exactly what's going to get us
all through this.
Cory... And I am never
going to go away.
You just don't get it, do you?
It's hard enough being in the same school with him.
In the same class with him.
And just when I get a moment
where I'm not thinking about him,
you want to come out and play?
How do you expect me to hang out with you and not think about him?
Because I'm not Shawn.
I'm me.
And I know that if you just let me be friends with you,
I promise I can make things better for you.
You want to be my friend?
Yeah.
And you're going to keep to yourself how I feel about him?
Yeah.
'Cause I don't want him to stop looking for who he is
because he feels sorry for me. Okay?
So you promise me you're not going to say anything about this ever.
I won't say anything about this.
To anybody?
Can I talk about it with Topanga?
Topanga doesn't know.
Why not?
'Cause I haven't told her.
She's your best friend.
Right.
And you haven't told her?
Right.
But you told me.
Thanks.
It'll just be a secret between friends.
Come here.
So, in conclusion,
watches,
chocolate,
cheese.
Ladies and gentlemen, we give you the Swiss.
Thank you.
Eric, we were supposed to prove something.
He did.
Okay, folks, I think that's about all we can take today.
I'll see you all on Thursday.
Uh, I am so sorry.
I bet you have a really strong first impression of us, huh?
Indelible.
You know something, Dean? This didn't all come from me.
My boy Jackie here deserves the same grade I do.
(SIGHS) Done.
George.
George, may I have a word?
You want me to stay after school?
No, no, nothing so severe.
That was, um,
that was quite a presentation.
I don't know what got into me.
Well, I think what got into you
was something that never really left you.
I intended to come here strictly as a student.
I thought I had retired from teaching.
Yes. Well, when I stopped teaching to become dean,
I thought the same thing, but here I am.
We're teachers, George.
You put us in a classroom, we teach.
Yes, well, after all these years,
I still have a lot to learn.
I'm sorry, Rachel.
I guess I was a poor choice for a partner.
You know,
I got to admit, I'd much rather have you as a teacher
than as a partner.
I'd rather have him as a colleague than a student.
Perhaps you'd care to call my office about that.
Well, you have my gratitude, Dean Bolander.
You're welcome, George.
I look forward to your call.
Whoo-hoo-hoo-hoo!
Feeny!
Fee-hee-hee-hee-ney!
Ow!
Heh, heh, heh, what?
Wha-wha-what-what?
Hey!
(EXCLAIMING)
Dude, let's go.
Cory, I'm really glad that you've gotten over your fear of the bathroom,
but that's your fifth shower today.
(LAUGHS) I'm the cleanest boy in school.
So, you know that guy Tim in our econ class?
I was thinking maybe he and Angela could...
What do you think?
No! He's not right for...
I mean, she's not right for him.
I mean, I don't think we should be
setting up Angela so quickly.
Hey, Cory, what, do you, like, live here now?
No, no.
You know, I don't know what I was so afraid of.
These co-ed bathrooms are a sensational concept.
Yeah. Just think, if these things catch on,
they'll be putting them in people's homes.
What a terrific idea!
Hey, guys.
Hey, Angela.
Hey.
So, Cory,
what's up?
Nothing.